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Slam Girl, let me see them poems work

8/30/2018

In honor of my blogaversary I wanted to include my vlog. When I first started I would also record about my travels. Slowly, but surely I'm back at it.

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It's My Blogaversary

8/16/2018

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Originally this blog was to record all of my amazing travels around the world, but to be perfectly honest I haven't set foot out of country since it started. (sobs uncontrollably) HOWEVER, I have gone to quite a few places.

Places I've been since 2012
Louisville, KY
Greensboro, North Carolina
Decatur, GA
Berkley, CA
Oakland, CA
Kansas City, KS
Indianapolis, IN
Little Rock, AR
Dallas, TX
San Antonio, TX
Detroit, MI
Denver, CO
Madison, WI
Chicago, IL
Omaha, NE
Lincoln, NE
Sioux City, IA
New York, NY

I'm sure I'm forgetting some places, but you get it. This year I'm committing to stepping out of my comfort zone. So even if it's just a few hours away I'll find my way there. Seeing the world means even visiting places I can drive to. I go with a budget and the most affordable way to get around as much as possible. It's been fun. (local travel) But I'm renewing my passport. (Seriously)

I'm blessed to have made it this far. (like fooooooreal and I'm not gonna cry, nope). If you've been reading me since the beginning or just tuning in now welcome.

*Update on slam: We lost. I took it harder than normal. (Maybe because it's my last year) I feel like God was like... Take the whole slam away. This was the last Nationals for AWHILE. (Not just for me, but for everyone) Yea, my God be petty like that. (I love you JC!) So yea, only regional slams for me. Laters!

Little Rock, AR

Dallas, TX

Berkeley, CA

Float trip in MO

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Welcome to Slam

8/9/2018

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2018 Slam Team

If you have never been to a poetry slam, I'm sorry your life sucks. Hahaha! Nah, it's all good. My journey into the slam world started from seeing Twista and poet George Watsky spit. I was hooked. I hadn't ever spit my poems with so much fire, but I wanted to learn how.

At first it wasn't even for slam as much as for the stage that a group of us Beavers (my college mascot... I know...) got together with a piano and our notebooks. We started opening up for people like Shihan and The Asia Project. What I wanted us to do was attend CUPSI, the college slam competition, and I became obsessed with the Chicago team that went to Brave New Voices (BNV), the high school slam competition. But chick had to graduate from college and (gulp) adult.

I packed my bags for an internship in New York at the Nuyorican Poets Cafe. Broke. Fresh out of college. My hustle wasn't that great. So I packed my bags again and came to St. Louis.

Fast forward cause ya'll have read my blog. (right?) Any who, once in St. Louis I started hitting the open mics. Particularly, Legacy poet night on Fridays hosted by UrbArts and Hustle & Flow. Now you can find "hella" open mics in the Lou. One day, there was a slam being held. And I decided. Why not? Let's try it. I love new things.

Five years later and here I am still slamming. I've been flirting with "retiring" from competition. Letting these poems do some workshop rehab.

But first... I'm headed to Nationals with the St. Louis Poetry Slam team. Each year I learn something valuable about slam that I didn't know before.

2017 Slam Team

What is slam?
Slam is a sport of words and verbs. It is something that stems from the practice of break poetry. Every year teams from all over the country and poets from all over the world compete in slam competitions.

Are You Ready?
This year has felt completely different than other slam years. Maybe it's because I took a break and was asked to re-join later. Maybe it's because the team has "hella" group pieces. Or maybe I just know that I can do other things with my time so it makes slam time more charged now. I do know I want us to win this year and I think we can.

Why Slam?
I slam because it's a challenge for me. I started off as the poet who was cute, but... I wasn't connecting to audiences. I couldn't make the team even if I tried really hard. I wanted to do my best. I wanted to win. Through workshops and writing with others I've slowly transformed into a poet who actually can get my point across without it getting lost in translation. Now? I don't like the fact that I started becoming a poet who was "pimping pain for points". Not really, but I felt myself writing more about pain than anything else. How can I top this hurt. I know these stories must be told, but I wanted to heal. That's what I spent my time off doing. Healing.

I started writing to protest, to entice, to call to action, and to just vent. There was a time my poems were all about activism, erotica, faith, and whatever was on my heart at the time. I'm a broader writer now. Covering any and everything under the sun.

Since I've done the healing I just know slam (for me) isn't fun all the time. It hurts hearing all the things we've gone through as people. It hurts that our stories are so similar though we're all so different. It hurts. And though I cheer on my fellow poets. It gets difficult to sit in a room and be rubbed raw over and over. I often wonder if the people that NEED to hear these poems are even in the room.

The times I feel the need to slam, I'll go rock a slam. I'll still compete as a indie and support this city (St. Louis). BUUUUUUT first let's get this Nationals competition on! I ain't done yet gosh darn it. I'm ready to go. To see our team go rock those stages in Chicago.

I'll probably blog more than normal this month. Since it's my blogaversary.

Oh yea. Welcome to Slam.

2016 Slam Team

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Falling In & Out of Love With the Stage

8/2/2018

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"I fell in and out of love with him so much I stopped noticing the platform and just waited for the standing ovation. When it didn't come... I wondered if he still loved me or if we just got lost in translation."

Today, I found myself watching old videos of me doing poetry before I was a touring poet. Before I had any work published, before writing was a job, before it all became so... confusing.

Am I a actor or a writer?

I found myself smiling instead of groaning. I was so young and so happy to just share my work. It didn't matter if I messed up or if I was reading the poem or if I my camera shot was a little too wiggly. My jokes were corny and my goof still a ball.

It has never been about the stage, but has always been about my love of writing.

How often to we forget our why?

Why did we start doing what we loved? Why do we keep going? After each rejection letter, after each no, after each time you don't make it to finals.

Being a writer that loves to perform makes it difficult for me to just do readings with any sort of dead energy. The problem comes in when I start to wonder am I being myself or just someone else all together.

I found solace in videos of my younger self. The answer was there. I have always been a writer that just happens to love a good accent.

Instead of changing for the stage I allow myself to change the stage, to transform it completely without it consuming me. How many actors have you heard of taking their own lives? I decided long ago not to get lost in a character so much that I lose myself.

We poets often chant, "Remember why you wrote it!" Do you? Remember?

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Slam Girl, let me see them poems work

It's My Blogaversary

Welcome to Slam

Falling In & Out of Love With the Stage

Jump Rope Sis

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